ConVo 2014

Well, we went to our first ConVo this past weekend.  As norm my daughter and I completely stressed about everything for a couple of weeks before the event.  That's nothing new, we still do that before Midnight Flame and we're going on our 4th year of that festival.  So as norm, my daughter is running like a crazy person and I'm procrastinating till the last minute.  By the time we are ready to go both of us are rather stressed.  

The drive there was kinda nerve racking, I really don't like driving in or around Detroit, between the potholes and the crazy drivers, it's not a pleasant experience.  But we made it in one piece and truthfully, it was quite easy to find.  

I have to admit, the way some people were talking about it I really expected a HUGE hotel with trillions (okay, maybe not quite a trillion) people everywhere.  The hotel was actually very nice and there were quite a lot of people.  I think it was around a thousand people coming and going to the events and checking things out.  Of course, I'm guessing on that but at the raffle drawing they called a number that was over a thousand and since that was the number on our badges, it's a safe bet there was over a thousand. Either way, there was a lot of people there.

There was a room for artists to display and sale their artwork.  A good friend of ours had her prints on display.  She does lovely stuff.  It was interesting to look at the different displays.  I liked how there was such a variety, not like going to a crafts show and everyone is selling the exact same thing.  Next year I'm going to have to set money aside just for that room, I'm thinking.

The merchants room was smaller then I was expecting, I won't lie, but there was so much to look at and want.  It's probably a good thing it wasn't as big as I expected.  Of course we had to visit our friends' stall, The Magical Druid.  I really like their items and highly recommend them.  There were quite a variety of merchants, I spent way to much time and money in there. But I bought several things, magical and mundane, that I can't get around here.

I took several classes this weekend on a variety of subjects.  I was very impressed with all of the instructors.  It was a breath of fresh air to take a class from someone who had a good knowledge on the subject they were teaching.  The classes gave me some ideas on how to expand my practice.  They also solidified a few of my beliefs on my magical practices.  I am really grateful for the wonderful people who were willing to take the time to share their experience and knowledge.  

The thing that I enjoyed maybe the most was meeting up with old friends and just chatting and hanging out.  We had several new people come in to check us out, I do believe we may have some new members.  I know there was one lady who told us that we were the only group that actually welcomed her in and made her feel good.  Unfortunately, I had noticed that it was rather cliquey which is rather unfortunate.  It seemed like this is an excellent opportunity to expand your friends and experiences but a lot of people just seemed to only want to stick with the same people doing the same thing.  That was a bit of a disappointment, I will admit that. 

All in all, I really enjoyed myself.  Next year will be even better.  I'm looking forward to more classes, lectures, dancing and meeting more people.

The Next Step?

The other night while at work my mind started drifting, not an unusual thing since most of the jobs I do are very repetitious and it's very easy to zone out while doing them.  Anyway, I got to thinking about some friends who are Kemetic and some of their beliefs.  This thought led me to thinking about a visit to the Toledo Museum of Art that me and my daughter had taken a few years ago.  We were so excited to go because they were having a display on Ancient Egypt.  There were pieces of art work, jewelry and statues that had been taken from a tomb.  The big item that we were so excited to see was the mummy that they were displaying.  This was a big thing, you hear about them, see pictures of them but we were going to actually see a real one in "person", so to speak.  

Now, when we finally got to the case that held the mummy, all I could think of was how sad it was.  Looking down at this withered body wrapped in rags and looking so tiny and fragile, my only thought was how sad it was to have ended up here, on display for anyone to stare at.  The more I thought about it the sadder I became.  This withered, dried up thing used to be a person, someone who loved others, had people who loved them.  A person who had lived, loved and dead.  Their whole belief was that the items we were just admiring were buried with them for the sole purpose of their being able to continue their lives in the next life, like they had lived in this life.  Without those items, the artwork that talked of their life, their accomplishments and their funerals, most importantly, their names, they would cease to exist. I wondered, what happened to this poor soul when the items were taken from their tomb?  Was s/he living happily in the afterlife, then suddenly ripped out and scattered to nothingness because of the actions of the people who were taking their stuff from their tombs?  Did this person cease to exist?  While I enjoyed looking at the items, the mummy really depressed me, made me wonder why we needed to remove the body from it's resting place.

After thinking about this rather depressing subject I started thinking about how different religions had their own beliefs on what happens when we pass from this life. There are so many different places people believe we go after we die. Heaven.  Hell.  Nirvana. Isle of Apples. Summerland.  Reincarnation.  Nothing.  You get the picture. There are so many thoughts of what waits us when we leave this life.  

What happens once our spirit leaves this body?  My belief is that our minds, to some extent, create our afterlife.  Bare with me, this is an ongoing, evolving belief that I've been working on for years.  I believe that our minds, our thoughts, help form the afterlife we will be experiencing.  I don't think it controls it all, but I believe that at the beginning, when we leave our bodies, that our minds will create a reality that we expect, that we can deal with.  Of course this can be a double edged sword, if you believe in Hell and feel that is what you deserve, then that is where you go, same as if you believe you deserve Heaven, or Summerland.  That is where you will go.

Now, this thought lead me to what about Reincarnation? What about the belief that we all come from one source and that when we die we go back to that source?  How does this fit in?  I don't know, but it makes for some interesting thoughts. I honestly can't say I believe in either, but I remember reading somewhere that energy does not cease to exist, it is always there.  I believe our spirits are made of energy, so when we die we have to go somewhere.  Now, do we keep living different lives for all eternity? I don't know.  Maybe, but why?  Would it be to learn lessons?  That you can't move on till you learn that lesson? Or just to experience different types of life?  Would this go on forever? Or would it stop when you learn or experience all that you want?  Do you eventually find your way back to the one source that all life comes from. Before anyone says "Hey! What you mean by that?" I do believe that all life, everything in existence comes from one source, even the gods, goddesses, nature spirits, all that, come from this source.  That is my belief, so since this is my blog, I'm going with it. 

I remember reading in a Dean Koontz book, Odd Thomas, one of the main characters believed that this life is just boot camp, that the next life is war or the great adventure.  Now, I don't believe this is boot camp, but I kinda like the thought that the next life (and possibly the next, etc) are great adventures.  Before anyone laughs at me for developing an idea from a book, I am not saying this is what I believe in, but I think it's an interesting thought.  Sometimes you read something that makes you go "hmmm?"  Even if it's fiction, if it's a "hmmm" thought, it can be worth looking into or at least exploring.  When you think about it, it is in a way another variation of reincarnation.  I think I could go with each life as an adventure or a new experience over lessons to be learned.  After all, who's to say you won't learn any lessons having an adventure?  

Thinking about all these ideas about the afterlife makes me wonder why some spirits don't move on.  I know some people say they could be just an echo of something in the past, kinda like a recording of an event that happened.  Maybe, could be.  I don't know.  Could it be this persons' soul is stuck at this moment in time?  Forced to relive this one moment over and over again?  I'm thinking it's a possibility, especially if our minds are what really makes the afterlife what it is.  Maybe these echoes are people living it over and over again, unaware that they are doing it and unaware of anything else around them.  But then I started wondering about the spirits that are aware of the "living".  Why are the aware?  Why do they refuse to leave?  What are they afraid of?

Which makes you wonder, if these spirits we are seeing are just humans in another energy form, why are they stuck in this spot or time like this?  Was the experience so bad that they can't stop relieving it? Are they to afraid to leave?  I know some claim family members come back to warn, comfort or just check up on them.  So that leads to another thought.  As energy forms, can we not only choose our afterlife, but could we also choose to travel among different planes of reality or time?

As you can see, my thoughts bounce all over the place and take me on some interesting adventures.  I was hoping writing this would help me sort out my thoughts on this subject.  It did help some, but now I've more questions because of it.  

Wisdom

This will probably evolve and change some as my dp studies continue but it is a start.

From the Merriam-Webster.com

1  a : accumulated philosophic or scientific learning 

    b : ability to discern inner qualities and relationships 

   c : good sense 

   d : generally accepted belief <challenges what has become accepted wisdom among many historians — Robert Darnton>

2

   : a wise attitude, belief, or course of action

3

   : the teachings of the ancient wise men

Many people put a lot of emphasis on book learning, thinking that having several degrees and mounds of books obviously makes them a wise person.  According to the first definition of the word, it does, but to me that is only the beginning and really only a small portion of what the word really means.  I have known people that are certified geniuses but have not an ounce of common sense in them. 

I believe the most important part of this virtue is having the knowledge of what is right and wrong and acting on it.  All the book knowledge does no one any good if they don’t know how to use that knowledge. 

A person’s attitude makes a big difference.  I have known people who know a lot of stuff, have all kinds of knowledge, yet their attitude is awful.  They look down on people, talk down to them.  They think they are truly wise and are blessing others with their wisdom.  This is not the actions of a wise person.  A wise person shares their knowledge, listens to others and acts to benefit themselves or others.  This is what I am striving for, to have the knowledge, to know when to use it, when to listen to others and when to do nothing.

Thoughts on last weeks ritual

No fancy title today, just my thoughts and opinions on our Imbolc ritual Sunday.  Where to begin?  We had a pleasant surprise (okay, we were told they were coming, but still...) when Rob S. and his three little munchkins joined us for this ritual.  All three children took part in the ritual, they did an excellent job.  

I must say I am happy to see young children participating like that in rituals.  They did a very good job.  We tried a different approach to honoring Brid this year, instead of honoring her as a hearth goddess we tried looking at the bard side of her.  I think this ritual was diffidently better then last year, but it still lacked something.  I felt a stir of interest coming from her but not a "YES!! You've got it!!"  So I am assuming we are on the right track.  

It's kinda hard to get into Imbolc (my least fav. high day, truthfully).  I am not a follower of Brid, I respect her, especially for a healing many years ago that she gave me.  But I don't follow her and have no interest in ever following her.

Also, I just feel there is more to this high day then just honoring Brid.  I noticed another grove had honored Brid and the Cailleach, their ritual was quite beautiful.  I would love it if we explored this avenue, but considering how much some members dug their heels in when it was suggested, I doubt it will happen, true shame.

Either way, I felt the ritual was better, not the best or as good as it could have been.  But a lot better then last year, best of all, our omens were really good, Brid seemed happy with the direction we had gone.  So that's good.

Imbolc By Any Other Name?

It’s that time of year again, Imbolc right around the corner.  And every year for several years now, I ask why?  I go through the motions, but truthfully, feel nothing for this high day.  I am not Celtic nor am I drawn to Brid, even though I have lots of Irish and Scotts blood in me, there is no connection to this hearth.  So every year I ask myself why?  Why must I honor Imbolc? Just because I am told its tradition?  Aren’t there other ways to honor this high day?

This year I decided to ask others why instead.  I posted a question on ADF General Decision board and got some very interesting answers that, truthfully, are helping me with this high day.  So I thought I’d share my thoughts and the answers that were giving to me. 

It is interesting all the different traditions that go along with this day, many that I had never associated with it, but now a light bulb is going off in my head.  The tradition of spring cleaning and preparing for the upcoming spring season seems to be a big part of the high day. This makes some sense to me but I think what made more sense was when a grove mate suggested including the Cailleach with our working of Brid.  After reading the myths that link these two goddesses together it does make sense and adds a depth that I hadn’t felt before.  I must admit though, the one big thing I enjoy about honoring Brid on Imbolc is all the crafty items you get to make, sorry, that’s just me.  I love making these kinds of things.

Several people had mentioned ways of honoring their own pantheon at this time of year.  Some honored deities associated with healing or plants, example Airmid, Epona and Demeter.  Demeter and Epona are associated with plants and the harvests to come while Airmid is an Irish goddess of healing, specifically herbs.  I find the Airmid the most interesting of the three because of her link to herbs, which I am teaching myself and have been for years.  Another person had mentioned that their grove honored Perkunas and Gabija, both Baltic deities.  Perkunas purifies the earth, getting it ready for spring will Gabija is also the goddess of hearth and fire. In the examples giving me, I find it interesting that they all share the aspect of preparing for spring, the coming of plants or are a hearth goddess, in the case of Gabija.  I had never before thought of this time along the lines they have and truthfully, it brings up a lot of interesting thoughts and ideas.

The Norse hearth cultures honor Disting, also known as Ewemeolc, on Feb 1 or 2.  The common tradition of this high day is blessing objects or tools and starting new projects.  Disting is very similar to Imbolc.  I’m curious as to why they are so close, could it been a case of neighbors influencing each other?

While all these traditions are still based on the assumption that spring is beginning, I still have to agree with the comment that had been made that being in Michigan, it’s the middle of winter, spring isn’t coming yet.  But what is coming is little more sunshine every day.  Maybe that’s why I don’t connect so much with this high day.  It doesn’t feel like spring is coming, to cold and dark, but it is the mid-point and it is getting lighter out sooner, the days are starting to get longer.  Maybe by only a few minutes, but it is happening.  That part I can connect with. 

Another tidbit mentioned, that I thought was interesting was the fact that a lot of people refer to the high days as Solstice, Equinox or Cross-quarter (add seasonal description) not Imbolc because of the fact they do not celebrate it.  This makes sense because you are describing what you are doing but not calling it something it isn’t.   

After taking notes, looking up different deities mentioned and different practices, I’m glad I asked this question.  It’s helped me define what I want in my own practice and helped me understand a little more about different groves way of handling this high day and different ways to honor Imbolc itself.  

Scents and Rituals?

Friday I was listening to a morning radio show and they were asking people a question.  If someone offered you a million dollars to give up one of your senses, which one would it be?  It seems the most popular answer was their sense of smell.  The reasons were logical.  No one wanted to be blind or deaf, losing your sense of touch could lead to very dangerous situations and losing your sense of taste?  Well, no one wanted to lose that because they liked eating to much.  They all stated they could live without their sense of smell.  That it was the least important sense. Really? Sense of smell not important?  Well, I can’t say I agree with them. 

While all the senses are equally important, in my humble opinion, and each enriches our lives in there own way.  I believe that our sense of smell effects us more then most people realize. 

What does this have to do with home practice, rituals or spiritual workings you ask? Okay, let’s do some visualization.  Close your eyes and imagine a bright sunny summer day.  What do you see?  What are you feeling? What are you smelling?  Smelling you ask? Yes, what scent makes you think of summer? Is it fresh cut grass? A barbeque?  Water at the lake?  How about picturing Yule.  What scent reminds you Yule?  Scents are good for triggering memories and emotions.

When you are creating a ritual, you think about the offerings, what you’re going to say, maybe even certain dance, music, extras like that.  Unfortunately a lot of time the scents used during a ritual is not taking into consideration.  In a ritual you are trying to create an atmosphere, a certain feel to what you are doing or experiencing.  If you use the right scent, the experience will be outstanding or at the least good.  But the wrong scent?  It can ruin what you are doing.  No matter how much thought and preparation used, if you use a scent you don’t like it will throw off everything.  When you use a smell you really don’t like you are not going to be concentrating on what you want to accomplish, no, you are going to be thinking about that horrible smell.

Now, there are many ways to add scents to your rituals, meditations or whatever you are working on at the moment.  The most popular way is through stick or cone incense.  In my opinion they are okay, I am not as happy with them as I used to because of the chemicals used in them or animal byproduct.  But just recently I have discovered some stick incense made that are organic and do not have animal byproduct in it.  You can also make your own; this is an adventure in itself.  Another popular method is burning herbs on a charcoal or throwing them into a fire.  And last but not least is using a simmering pot and essential oils.

What ever method you decide to try, just remember, use the scents you like, the ones that help you feel more connected to what you are doing.  Adding scents to your practice will add a whole new depth to your practice.  Be creative, be adventurous.  You will be glad you did.

New Year, New Thoughts, New Adventures...

Today is the first day of the new year, every one is making all kinds of resolutions to be a better person, to be a healthier person, etc.  I thought about it, thought about the resolutions I had made in the past.  None that lasted more then a week or two.  But this year, this year is going to be different.  Instead of making big plans, set goals, I am working a little at a time.  Not towards some big goal or plan. Nope, never works for me. So why bother?

Instead, each day I am working on little things.  Sorting through my possessions and donating them, working on my dedicate path, crafts/art projects or just taking the time to relax and listen to the universe around me.  Baby steps. That's what it is. Baby steps down the road, might take a little longer, but I'm thinking I'll enjoy the process a lot more.

This blog will not only include stuff on my dedicant path, it will also include things that are also part of my path, not just ADF.  I love ADF, but there is more to me then just this, so it makes sense that this blog, will primarily about my pagan journey will include everything that makes me me.

Here's hoping my readers, if I have any, will enjoy the journey as much as I will.